The Office - Season 3, Episode 14 - Ben Franklin
This episode opens with Michael taping a video to his son (not even born or created yet) just in case Michael dies at an early age.
Michael: Yesterday I was scraping some gunk off my wall sockets with a metal fork, and I gave myself the nastiest shock. And when I came to, I had an epiphery. Life is precious. And if I die, I want my … son … to know the dealio. The dealio of life.
He shares many wonderful lessons in this video such as:
Michael: Number eight. Learn how to take off a woman’s bra.
He also tries to show his son how to jump start a car which would definitely result in the car blowing up. Oh that Michael!
We also see Dwight being Michael's right-hand man again. Kiss-ass mode in full effect!
Michael announces to the office that in one week Phyllis is getting married and they are going to be parties in the office for Phyllis and her soon to be husband Bob Vance.
Michael: So get your suits to the dry cleaners, and get your hair did. And Karen, you might want to invest in a dress or a skirt of some kind, if you don’t already have one. This may be Phyllis’ only wedding ever. It’s my job to ensure that none of you look like ragamuffins.
Michael institutes Prima Nocta.
Jim: Prima nocta, I believe from the movie, Braveheart, and confirmed on Wikipedia, is when the king got to deflower every new bride on her wedding night. So …
Michael: I’m sorry. I had a very different understanding as to what prima nocta meant.
Michael stops in on the girls decorating the conference room for Phyllis' bridal shower. A bunch of unintended gay jokes roll off of Michael's tongue.
Packer: Halpert! Tall, queer, handsome as ever. Hey everybody, it’s me, Jim. Hello, hello. Todd Packer.
Karen: Karen Fillipelli. Jim’s girlfriend.
Packer: Shut up! Shut it!
Karen: That’s rude.
Packer: Either this chick is a dude, or Halpert got scared straight!
This guy is a trip. He comes in and shakes up the whole office being loud and obnoxious. Love him! Would have been cool to see him and Andy interact.
Todd tells Michael that he needs to get strippers for the parties. Michael puts Jim on it - and Dwight jumps in and gets the strippers for the guys and puts Jim on duty for getting a stripper for the girls.
Michael: I can’t get a stripper here. Sexual harassment.
Packer: Get one for the girls, too. That evens it out. You know, separate but equal.
Michael: So that’s what that means.
Dwight calls for the female stripper and has a list of what he wants the stripper to look like. Redhead or Brunette? Blond (says Jim). Ohhh yes, Blond.
Dwight: Ruddy cheeks, thick calves, no tats, no moles. No tats. No … tats. Of course I want –
Jim: Stop. That’s disgusting.
Dwight: Leave me alone and get the male stripper.
Jim: Fine.
Dwight: I knew you would, Nancy.
Jim: Sally.
Jim: Michael referred me to a male strip club called Banana Slings. Instead, I called the Scholastic Speakers of Pennsylvania.
Meanwhile Ryan and Michael go to an adult store to pick up some bachelor party goods and spends the whole time giggling! We also get to hear one of Michael's fun ring tones - I think it was the Black Eyed Peas again.
In the background of all this is the Jim-Karen-Pam love triangle that kinda exists.
Karen talks about how Jim and her have had a lot of talks lately about Pam.
Jim: Karen and I had a long … talk last night. And the night before that. And uh … every night. For the last five nights.
Karen is definitely worried about Pam and is probably getting a little obsessed over it (like any girl would rightfully do!). Pam has realized that there are some weird vibes between them. She asks Jim what's up and he just says him and Karen have been having a lot of talks and he isn't sleeping enough. Pam reminds Jim in a very awkward conversation that he needs to get his 8 hours of sleep!
Later in the episode Karen talks to Pam and tells Pam that she knows about the kiss. Pam didn't know how to react but insisted (after a Freudian slip saying she was interested in Jim) that Karen and Jim should be together.
Pam: I was confused by your phrasing.
Elizabeth: Hi guys! I hear there’s an important meeting here.
Except for Kevin who clearly wants a piece. The stripper suggests giving a lap dance to Bob Vance but he refuses. Michael says he will take one and suddenly feels very guilty.
Michael: You smell nice. Like Tide.
Roy doesn't want to get a lap dance either. It seems he is still deeply in love with Pam.
Roy: I’m not really into strippers. You know what I find sexy? Pam’s art. She’s an artist. And I appreciate that. It’s very moving. And … sexy. The art.
The "stripper" arrives at the girl's party and it is no other than Benjamin Franklin! Now we know who Jim hired to strip for the girls. Ben thinks this is an educational speaking engagement. He attempts to give a talk in character and the girls ask naughty questions which Ben actually really likes!
Karen: Mr. Franklin, do you have a girlfriend?
Ben Franklin: I have a lovely wife, Deborah.
Pam: But don’t you have girlfriends in Paris? Like, a lot of them?
Ben Franklin: Ah, well, that is a gray area of my life.
Karen: Oh, Ben Franklin tied a cherry stem in his mouth!
Pam: Do you wear boxers, briefs, or pantaloons?
Later on Ben starts to hit on Pam because of her questions during the party.
Ben Franklin: You know, I invented electricity.
Pam: I know.
Ben Franklin: Well, I’m sensing a little electricity right here.
Pam: Didn’t Ben Franklin have syphilis?
Ben Franklin: Yes. But I don’t. My name is Gordon.
Pam: Oh …
The office teases Pam a little bit about it and Pam, in front of Jim, tells Ryan he has to hook her up.
Pam: God, I need a boyfriend. You know, Ryan, I’m totally ready to be set up with one of your business school friends. Whenever.
Michael is feeling very guilty about the little lap dance and worries what Jan would think. He asks Ben Franklin and the stripper what they think he should do - tell Jan, or not?
Pictures from Life in the Office - Go Check Out Their Great Recap and High Resolution Pictures!
Quotes from the ever wonderful Office Tally.
Michael: Yesterday I was scraping some gunk off my wall sockets with a metal fork, and I gave myself the nastiest shock. And when I came to, I had an epiphery. Life is precious. And if I die, I want my … son … to know the dealio. The dealio of life.
He shares many wonderful lessons in this video such as:
Michael: Number eight. Learn how to take off a woman’s bra.He also tries to show his son how to jump start a car which would definitely result in the car blowing up. Oh that Michael!
We also see Dwight being Michael's right-hand man again. Kiss-ass mode in full effect!
Michael announces to the office that in one week Phyllis is getting married and they are going to be parties in the office for Phyllis and her soon to be husband Bob Vance.
Michael: So get your suits to the dry cleaners, and get your hair did. And Karen, you might want to invest in a dress or a skirt of some kind, if you don’t already have one. This may be Phyllis’ only wedding ever. It’s my job to ensure that none of you look like ragamuffins.
Michael institutes Prima Nocta.
Jim: Prima nocta, I believe from the movie, Braveheart, and confirmed on Wikipedia, is when the king got to deflower every new bride on her wedding night. So …
Michael: I’m sorry. I had a very different understanding as to what prima nocta meant.
Michael stops in on the girls decorating the conference room for Phyllis' bridal shower. A bunch of unintended gay jokes roll off of Michael's tongue.
Michael: Sort of a guys’ night out. A G-N-O, if you will. A guh-no. Actually, it’s more of a Guys’ Afternoon In. A G-A-I. A gai. Not … not it’s uh, not gay.
Michael: It’s a bridal shower for guys. A guy shower. An hour-long shower with guys.
Then we get a visit from Todd Packer.
Packer: Halpert! Tall, queer, handsome as ever. Hey everybody, it’s me, Jim. Hello, hello. Todd Packer.Karen: Karen Fillipelli. Jim’s girlfriend.
Packer: Shut up! Shut it!
Karen: That’s rude.
Packer: Either this chick is a dude, or Halpert got scared straight!
This guy is a trip. He comes in and shakes up the whole office being loud and obnoxious. Love him! Would have been cool to see him and Andy interact.
Todd tells Michael that he needs to get strippers for the parties. Michael puts Jim on it - and Dwight jumps in and gets the strippers for the guys and puts Jim on duty for getting a stripper for the girls.
Michael: I can’t get a stripper here. Sexual harassment.
Packer: Get one for the girls, too. That evens it out. You know, separate but equal.
Michael: So that’s what that means.
Dwight calls for the female stripper and has a list of what he wants the stripper to look like. Redhead or Brunette? Blond (says Jim). Ohhh yes, Blond.
Dwight: Ruddy cheeks, thick calves, no tats, no moles. No tats. No … tats. Of course I want –
Jim: Stop. That’s disgusting.
Dwight: Leave me alone and get the male stripper.
Jim: Fine.
Dwight: I knew you would, Nancy.
Jim: Sally.
Jim: Michael referred me to a male strip club called Banana Slings. Instead, I called the Scholastic Speakers of Pennsylvania.
Meanwhile Ryan and Michael go to an adult store to pick up some bachelor party goods and spends the whole time giggling! We also get to hear one of Michael's fun ring tones - I think it was the Black Eyed Peas again.In the background of all this is the Jim-Karen-Pam love triangle that kinda exists.
Karen talks about how Jim and her have had a lot of talks lately about Pam.
Jim: Karen and I had a long … talk last night. And the night before that. And uh … every night. For the last five nights.
Karen is definitely worried about Pam and is probably getting a little obsessed over it (like any girl would rightfully do!). Pam has realized that there are some weird vibes between them. She asks Jim what's up and he just says him and Karen have been having a lot of talks and he isn't sleeping enough. Pam reminds Jim in a very awkward conversation that he needs to get his 8 hours of sleep!
Later in the episode Karen talks to Pam and tells Pam that she knows about the kiss. Pam didn't know how to react but insisted (after a Freudian slip saying she was interested in Jim) that Karen and Jim should be together.Pam: I was confused by your phrasing.
Pam: I’m not into Jim. Yeah.
The bachelor/bachelorette-bridal shower is underway. The guys get a blond stripper that makes all the men in the office feel very uneasy.
Elizabeth: Hi guys! I hear there’s an important meeting here.Except for Kevin who clearly wants a piece. The stripper suggests giving a lap dance to Bob Vance but he refuses. Michael says he will take one and suddenly feels very guilty.
Michael: You smell nice. Like Tide.
Roy doesn't want to get a lap dance either. It seems he is still deeply in love with Pam.
Roy: I’m not really into strippers. You know what I find sexy? Pam’s art. She’s an artist. And I appreciate that. It’s very moving. And … sexy. The art.
The "stripper" arrives at the girl's party and it is no other than Benjamin Franklin! Now we know who Jim hired to strip for the girls. Ben thinks this is an educational speaking engagement. He attempts to give a talk in character and the girls ask naughty questions which Ben actually really likes!Karen: Mr. Franklin, do you have a girlfriend?
Ben Franklin: I have a lovely wife, Deborah.
Pam: But don’t you have girlfriends in Paris? Like, a lot of them?
Ben Franklin: Ah, well, that is a gray area of my life.
Karen: Oh, Ben Franklin tied a cherry stem in his mouth!
Pam: Do you wear boxers, briefs, or pantaloons?
Later on Ben starts to hit on Pam because of her questions during the party.
Ben Franklin: You know, I invented electricity.
Pam: I know.
Ben Franklin: Well, I’m sensing a little electricity right here.
Pam: Didn’t Ben Franklin have syphilis?
Ben Franklin: Yes. But I don’t. My name is Gordon.
Pam: Oh …
The office teases Pam a little bit about it and Pam, in front of Jim, tells Ryan he has to hook her up.
Pam: God, I need a boyfriend. You know, Ryan, I’m totally ready to be set up with one of your business school friends. Whenever.
Michael is feeling very guilty about the little lap dance and worries what Jan would think. He asks Ben Franklin and the stripper what they think he should do - tell Jan, or not?
Ben Franklin: These things only serve to upset the women. They are the gentler sex.
Michael: Wow. Ben Franklin, you’re really kind of a sleazebag.
Michael: Stripper? Could I ask you a question? About women? Um … should I tell my girlfriend that you danced up on me?
Elizabeth: Secret secrets are no fun. Secret secrets hurt someone.
Michael: Wow. Thank you.
Michael listens to the stripper and tells Jan. Jan doesn't get mad about the lap dance - she is more upset that there are bachelor parties and strippers going on in the office. She is closer to firing him than breaking up with him.
Pictures from Life in the Office - Go Check Out Their Great Recap and High Resolution Pictures!
Quotes from the ever wonderful Office Tally.
Labels: Recap, The Office
posted by Shawn at 9:30 AM
1 Comments:
this is turning out to the best Office season yet! the dour perfomances and WTF expressions on these characters faces are so priceless. Jim, especially, whenever he looks at the camera after one of Michael's antics or comments is reason enough to love the show.
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